(Note from Daven:  This is an outstanding article, and I think everyone should read this.  As I say in the next part, When I first read it, I got chills.  You can find Wren’s site at http://www.witchvox.com on the net.  Check them out, The Witch’s Voice is one of the most important sites on the net, and a real boon for those of us in the Craft. This article is used by permission.)

Neo-Pagans and Self Actualization
(February, 21st., 1999)
-by Wren Walker

College students and business managers are familiar with the works of Abraham Harold Maslow. Psychology professors often include Maslow in their classroom course of study for the same reason that corporate trainers may implant some of his material buried within their orientation or management skills workshops. Maslow had an interesting theory.

Building A Pyramid

Abe Maslow earned his Ph.D. in psychology from the University of Wisconsin in 1934. Early in his career, he conducted extensive research into the behavior of monkeys-more specifically into the needs of monkeys and which of those needs was fulfilled in what order. From this research came his now famous “hierarchy of needs” theory. This “need scale’ is often shown as a visual graph in the shape of a pyramid. From the bottom to the top, the basic needs are:

1. The physiological needs. These are the basics of maintaining life and good health: Water, food, certain vitamins and minerals, temperature, oxygen, etc. Also included in this category are the needs to be active, to rest, to reproduce, to avoid pain and to sleep. (If you have ever had that ‘need’ for chocolate, then you know how REALLY important these needs can be!)

2. The safety and security needs. After people have satisfied the needs in the first set -and devoured that chocolate bar-the next need that they turn to is the establishment of a safe and secure environment. Shelter, structure, order and some limitations to the influence of outside forces manifest in the search for that “safe neighborhood”, a good job, a little nest egg for emergencies and some good hiding places for those chocolate bars. A system of law and justice becomes an important factor for consideration on this level. If someone steals your candy bar, dammit, you want to know that they are either going to buy you a new one or pay the consequences…

3. The love and belonging needs. After people are fed and secure, a third factor begins to emerge: the need to establish relationships through friends, lovers and family. In time, this need to be with others of our own kind will extend outward into a community setting. We date, marry, have families, go on trips, join clubs, and celebrate all the highs and lows of life within these circles. We want our friends and families to share our joys and be with us in our sorrows. Some of our favorite folks become our favorite folks when they offer to share their chocolate bar with us.

4. The esteem needs. Maslow splits the esteem needs into two groups-the higher and the lower. The lower one is the need for the respect of others, the need for status and glory, recognition, fame, attention and even dominance. Lower esteem needs may come and go with the outside forces and people who are providing them.

The higher esteem needs are met within ourselves and so, while they are harder to establish perhaps, they also harder to lose once attained. You don’t have to please “mommy’ in order to get that chocolate bar anymore. You’ve earned your own money and now you can buy your own candy whenever you want to. Maybe even start your own candy bar company…

Obviously, this is a very simplistic version of the first four hierarchies. But even in this short description, we can see where some of these needs would overlap and shift depending on our circumstances. If we get fired from our jobs or get a failing grade in a class (level 4 needs), then our needs move back a bit and we may compensate by seeking more love and acceptance (level 3 needs) from our family and friends until we regain our emotional footing. We may even go to our rooms, shut the door and not come out for a while (level 2). Please slip the chocolate bar under the door.

Your life experiences may also color how you view these basic needs. If you were always hungry as a child, food may be important to you throughout your life. If you were rejected or abused, you’ll focus on love and acceptance needs. If your parents were “overachievers”, then you may always feel that you have to measure up to the same standard or be considered a failure.

O.K. Wren , this is all very interesting stuff, but what does it have to do with Neo-paganism?

Maybe nothing. Maybe a lot. Maybe a look at the top of the pyramid is in order.

The Top Of The Pyramid

5. The growth -or self actualization -needs. These needs are what drives people-motivates people-to keep seeking, keep trying, keep looking for something more. If all the needs of humanity could be truly satisfied with simply meeting the needs in the first four categories, the world would have long since fallen into decay and stagnation. Something else drives some people to look for…well, something else.

Maslow, as he formulated his theory, expressed his opinion that only 2% of people were what he called, ‘self-actualizing’ personalities. That is a very small number indeed. But when you consider that most of the world’s populations are still struggling with famines, droughts, wars, poverty, economic unease and ethnic unrest, this is not really that surprising. The first four needs have not been met there.

Who are the self actualizers? Maslow took a group of people that he considered to be self actualizing personalities and studied their lives, their writings and their achievements. From this study, he came up with certain traits that may identify such personalities. In this group, he included people like Abraham Lincoln, Thomas Jefferson, Mahatma Gandhi, Albert Einstein, William James, Eleanor Roosevelt and others. To Maslow, these self actualizing people had much in common.

Self actualizers are reality centered. They can tell what is fake and what is real, what is dishonest from what is genuine. They are problem-solvers-which means that they approach life’s difficulties as problems demanding solutions, not as personal disasters to be avoided or blamed on someone or something else. They also do not believe the ends justify the means, but rather that the means could actually be ends in themselves. In other words, they held the maxim that “the journey is its own reward”.

Here is where you may begin to recognize yourself or some other pagans that you may know. Here is where many of the tenets-or even goals- of Neo-paganism can be seen. Perhaps here too is where you will find a description of who you -without even knowing anything about Maslow or his theories-may be striving to become.

Neo-Paganism May Be A Good Breeding Place For Self Actualizers

Self actualizers relate to others in ways that other personality types do not. They are very private people and are quite comfortable being alone. Talking to a few people that I consider to be self actualizers, they all stress that they have a very strong NEED (emphasis theirs) to be alone sometimes. They simply have to have this private interlude in order to be happy.

Self actualizers are fairly independent of current cultural trends. They pick what they want to adopt -only for those reasons important to themselves- and disregard the rest. They tend to rely on their own experiences and make their own judgments. They do not bow to public pressure or change their core beliefs and values when the rest of society decides that this or that is the latest cool fad. They are non-conformists, but in a totally positive way. They don’t try to change other people’s views, but are simply comfortable with their own and don’t really care if other people are not.

Self actualizers believe in democracy. (Thomas Jefferson, you could say, would be the prime example of this type of belief.) They are open to the diversity and variety of independent thinkers to the point of celebration. They find different points of view to be challenging rather than threatening, stimulating rather than crushing, to be encouraged rather than to be avoided.

They also tend to develop very close friendships with only a few select people-often other self actualizers-who may hold different views on subjects, but similarly embrace the love of diversity. They find relationships with many other people outside this group to be both shallow and somewhat exhausting.

Other traits of self actualizers include:

A sense of humor that is most often directed at themselves and at the foibles of society rather than used as a weapon against others.

A readiness to accept people as they find them rather than try to change them. (They themselves change only to suit themselves, so in fact here they are just returning the favor.) Self actualizers tend to have some traits that they consider “quirks” and accept that same “quirkiness” in others as a unique and interesting twist. Yet for all this, they are often very conventional in speech and appearance as they have no “need’ to draw attention to themselves. (as in level 4).

Self actualizers can look at old things in the same way that a child looks at a kitten for the first time. Every day is new and fresh and exciting. This also explains their ability to come up with innovative ideas seemingly from “out of the blue.”

They have their faults, of course. They can suffer anxiety over the state of the world, over evil, over those who just don’t seem to “get it.” They can be absent-minded as they muse away. lost in their own thoughts. And if their need for privacy is not met, they can become cold, withdrawn, humorless and be quite scathing and cynical.

Sure sounds like a lot of pagans that I know…

The Road To Self Actualization Is Not A Free Ride!

Looking back at the traits of self actualizers, we also can see many of these traits reflected in the basic beliefs of many Neo-pagan practitioners. Maybe even in ourselves.

Neo-paganism is, if nothing else, a spiritual journey, a search as it were both for self and for…that something else.

Let’s take a look at some of things that self actualizers and many Neo-pagan belief systems and their practitioners have in common. While your mileage may vary, and not all groups or individuals may believe or strive toward all of these traits, at least to me, some of these traits look an awful lot like what we believe in-or profess to believe in- and strive to emulate.

These are the “must haves” for self actualizers. These are the things that they say that they need in order to be happy.

1. Truth. Neo-paganism is not a fantasy world of made-up characters. It is not a role-playing game. It is a real and growing group of diverse individuals on a spiritual search to both recapture and rekindle lost earth-based religious practices and beliefs and to develop new theological paradigms. Where this will ultimately take us, we are not sure. There may never be an ultimate truth. But for us, the “journey is the reward.” Neo-paganism is not escapism from the “real world”, but a desire to return to earth-based religions in order to understand, embrace and appreciate real life at it fullest. In order to do that, Neo-pagans realize-as do self actualizers-that they are comfortable only when they are truly being themselves.

Anyone who feels the need to put on a false face is not yet self actualized. Such can be found within the Neo-pagan community, of course, as in all walks of life and society. These people are probably still working on level 3 or 4 needs. In time, tiring of the energy expended in maintaining such a facade, they may find ways to meet these lower needs in more constructive ways and eventually come to self actualization.

2. Beauty. The glory of the sunset, the gentle glow of the moon, the softness of a child’s cheek and the crashing of coming thunder-all these things have meaning and beauty to us. This is not a denial that life has its ugly moments, that people can act in selfish ways (What needs have not been met there?) or that vulgarity is often a part of mainstream humor. It is simply that when we meditate, we tend to choose those symbols that radiate beauty of some kind. Why? Because beauty raises us up to a higher level. We’ll examine this experience of the ‘higher level” a bit later.

3. Goodness. Yes, I know that we “all have our dark side.” But self actualizers have already met this part of themselves. struggled with it, embraced it, integrated it and still believe that not only are they themselves basically “good”, but that almost everyone else is as well. That “humans are sinful creatures by nature” thing is a concept that most Neo-pagans reject.

Another trait of self actualized personalities is that they have developed their own sense of morality. This would be scary in a less developed personality-and we have seen the effects of such certainly within the pagan community-yet because of the spiritual balance and equilibrium that has been achieved, self actualizers rarely do anything that hurts another–not because of fear of punishment or the breaking of an outside moral code (to some, their mores may actually seem amoral), but because they feel it would be an affront to beauty, to vitality, to truth.

4. Unity. Not as in “we must all believe exactly the same thing in the same way”. In fact, as we have seen, the love of diversity and variety is one of the strongest traits in self actualized people. (This trait which runs so very strongly throughout Neo-pagan thought was actually what got me interested in writing this article.) No, what is meant here by unity is “wholeness”. Self actualizers need to feel whole within themselves and integrated within their spirit. While some Neo-pagans have done this-and many others are striving to do so-it is also already very much part of what we both believe in and embrace. One of the basics of pagan belief systems has always been a desire to reconnect- reintegrate- with the earth and the Old Ways. We are seeking wholeness.

5. Vitality. Repeating lessons or rituals by rote is not enough for self actualizers. They were probably bored to the verge of tears and doodling pentacles in their notebooks. The history lesson must be more than names and dates. The ritual must be more than atmosphere and gestures. Dead religious forms, non-viable religious tenets, have no appeal to self actualizers. They don’t appeal to most pagans either. The religion-by-rote model is what many discarded on the road to Neo-paganism and they won’t settle for it here either.

6. Self-sufficiency. Self actualizers find meaningfulness in their own way and realize that each person must do the same. The work is personal. It can never be anything else. You have to want it and you have to want it bad. So badly, that nothing will deter you from the quest for very long. You keep coming back to it. You can’t explain what it is that you are looking for any better than self actualizers can tell you how they themselves found it. (Note 1)

Each person-led on by the need to attain self actualization-finds his or her own way there. It cannot be transferred by a touch or learned from books. In fact, if you ask self actualizers how they got there, they have a difficult time trying to explain it. Words cannot convey anything more than hints as to where to look and what may be helpful.

Which in fact brings us now to that trait that I believe to be the most compelling evidence that, within the scope of Neo-paganism, self actualization may be taking place on a large scale.

Peak Experiences

I talk with a lot of pagans every day. I have probably talked with thousands over the last three years. There is no doubt in my mind that many, many of these people have experienced what Maslow called “peak experiences.” Self actualizers, he found, tend to have more peak experiences than the average person.

A peak experience is one that takes you out of yourself, beyond yourself. It can make you feel very large or very small. It gives you the feeling of being a part of the eternal, the whole, the infinite. During these episodes, things become very clear. Mystics call this a state of “illumination” for that reason. A large pattern or plan becomes evident and your part in it comes into focus.

This is where you walk with the Gods as an equal. Where every separate thing finds its place in the whole. This is the place from whence you leave as having been changed forever.

“Feelings of limitless horizons opening up to the vision, the feeling of being simultaneously more powerful and also more helpless than one ever was before, the feeling of ecstasy and wonder and awe, the loss of placement in time and space with, finally, the conviction that something extremely important and valuable had happened, so that the subject was to some extent transformed and strengthened even in his daily life by such experiences.”–Abraham Maslow.

These states can come at any time and at any stage of life. In fact, many people who still have a long way to go toward self actualization have peak experiences too. The artist, the musician, the poet, the writer, the diver, the skier, the engineer, the saint, the prisoner, the inventor and many other types have experienced this as a fleeting moment which occurs while they are pursuing their work or in deep thought. The difference with actual self actualizers is that they tend to have these peak experiences more often and that the experiences may last for a longer time when they do.

This would indicate that self actualization itself is more a matter of degree, or familiarity of the process if you will, than an ultimate one time, one-shot goal. It is not something that is sought out for the experience itself. Some Buddhist masters teach that psychic gifts and certain powers are not to be sought as gifts and powers in themselves. They will develop as the individual develops. At that point, they are accepted without egotism. When they no longer are sought in an attempt to fulfill a level 3 or 4 need, they simply are there.

Self actualized people have more peak experiences- and they have more peak experiences because they are self actualized. Like in the Buddhist philosophy, a peak experience can not be achieved as the result of a wish fulfillment for a lower hierarchy need. There are no shortcuts and, as a general rule, none of the other need levels can be circumvented to reach this one. (note 2)

Are Neo-Pagans REALLY More Self Actualized?

Some days, I really wonder. There are the flame wars, the Witch wars and the backstabbing. There are self appointed gurus, power seekers, money grabbers and abusers of all kinds.

But then, there are also all those people that I have talked with. They have told me their stories in the halting and uncertain words that leads me to believe that they truly are attempting to describe a very real experience that goes beyond what words have the capacity to contain. They know that they have been changed by this experience.

Is there something-some formula- within paganism that may offer a springboard toward self actualization? (note 3)

I doubt that we shall ever find a set formula-in fact, we cannot because as we have seen, peak experiences are not achieved through the practice of a mere technique. It may actually be dangerous to do so because unless the other lower needs have been met and those experiences integrated into the personality, mental or emotional unbalance or even illness may occur.

But there are some practices that regularly take place within paganism that may help to meet the lower needs, integrate personality imbalances and bring about the changes that allow for self actualization to occur. They are:

1. Connection to the divine within and the divine-by whatever name-without. With this comes the realization of integration of the parts into a whole. This is exceptionally good therapy for fragmented personalities. It also builds self esteem. (level 4).

2. Acceptance. Many pagans have that “coming home” feeling when they first begin their journey on a pagan path (level three) and because they may have fears of being discriminated against because of their beliefs, they also find safety and security in interacting with other pagans, (level 2).

3. Respect. Most pagans are quite tolerant of alternative viewpoints. (level 3 and 4) Of course, this depends on the other individual’s higher needs at level 4 being met. If a person is still working out his/her own esteem needs by utilizing the lower level 4 version- through seeking glory, attention, fame or status-it is less likely that they will be able to give to anyone else what they themselves feel that they do not have yet. Happily, the pagan community seems to have sufficient numbers of pagans who are confident in who they are and are free to engage in debates and discussions without the need (lower level 4) to win at another’s expense or at any cost. That’s respect.(higher level 4)

4. Shamanic journeying. meditations, guided imagery, altered states of consciousness. Many pagan paths embrace some or all of these practices. While caution is advised when undertaking any of these practices under the guidance of someone that you may not know well enough to have formed an opinion of his/her motivations, these techniques offer many therapeutic benefits. Under the loving care of a truly gifted, knowledgeable and sincere guide, these practices can heal broken emotions and offer insights into deep-seated problems that the conscious mind often blocks out to the detriment of further growth. Many therapists use some form of imagery work in their practice.(level 2,3, 4)

“This ability of healthier people to dip into the unconscious and preconscious, to use and value their primary processes instead of fearing them, to accept their impulses instead of always controlling them, to be able to regress voluntarily without fear, turns out to be one of the main conditions of creativity.” –Maslow.

5. Neo-pagans tend to embrace and value the same traits that self actualized people possess: truth and personal authenticity, beauty, goodness, unity or wholeness, self-sufficiency and vitality. These ‘values’ provide support and encouragement for those who are seeking to develop these traits within themselves. This may eventually lead to meeting those lower level needs and to providing a background from which peak experiences are more likely to occur.

Many of us may have already met pagans who have had peak experiences or who are self actualizers. You may be one yourself. There seems to be a large number of them throughout the Neo-pagan community. They tend to be rather private about personal matters-a trait of self actualizers, as we know- but since other self actualizers are probably the only ones who can understand what this experience is all about, they do tend to find one another. A few words and a nod usually says it all. They understand. They’ve been there. They may not have a tangible t-shirt, but they do have “something.” And yet as they will quite freely admit, they too have only just begun the journey.

Neo-paganism has been on its own journey to rediscover its past. What needs have already been met along the way?

Then comes the even bigger question: What needs still have to be met in order to move Neo-paganism on up to the next level? Will the need for self actualization continue to be- if not actually promised-at least very possible within the perimeters of Neo-paganism? Or will we remain at some lower level-struggling with self esteem needs and with safety needs- for a long time to come yet?

Maslow listed some of what he considered to be the effects that self actualizing personalities report from peak experiences:

The removal of neurotic symptoms

A tendency to view oneself in a more healthy way

Change in one’s view of other people and of one’s relations with them

Change in one’s view of the world

The release of creativity, spontaneity and expressiveness

A tendency to remember the experience and to try to duplicate it

A tendency to view life in general as more worthwhile.

Our society suffers from disengagement, disillusionment and disassociation disorders. Contrary to what some religious doomsayers would have us believe, society is not so much ‘un-holy’ as it is “un-whole-ly.” Paganism addresses this fragmented sense of self in unique and innovative ways.

In my more cynical moments, I have sometimes been heard to say that the Neo-pagan community needs therapy. As I write this article, it occurred to me that perhaps the Neo-pagan community IS the therapy. Perhaps that is one reason why Neo-paganism is on the rise and that so many self actualizers can be found within its ranks. (note 4) The world needs to experience wholeness and, at least here in the Neo-pagan community, people seem to be finding it at some level.

In the decades ahead, this formation of a new pathway into wholeness may be written into the annals of psychology journals and religious history as our ultimate gift to humanity.

Walk in Light and Love,

February 21st, 1999
The Witches’ Voice
Clearwater, Florida

(Note from Daven:  If you want to go directly to the next installment, click this link.)

Footnotes:

Note 1: I have selected only a few of the traits that Maslow attributed to self actualizers. A full list may be found in the references listed below.

Note 2: I mention that this is usually the case because there are reported instances of peak experiences from people who seem not to have had level one needs met. Rembrandt was poor most of his life, vanGogh was probably psychotic and imprisoned men and women-some suffering under extremely cruel conditions-have written soaring poetry, painted masterpieces or developed inventions. Perhaps the development of personal ingenuity in meeting the other need levels in some way compensated for lack in the basics.

Note 3: Maslow himself realized that this theory was not a final answer, but perhaps could be viewed as just the first step in a new way of thinking about motivation. Critics have pointed out that communication seems to be lacking from the list. I would also point out that while communication may indeed be important on the lower levels of the pyramid, words fail when it comes to the self actualization experience itself. Transpersonal psychology is an outgrowth of Maslow’s work.

Others accuse Maslow of being “too good”-of having too much faith in the inherent goodness of mankind. Some days, I tend to agree with them.

Note 4: The old ‘wise ones’ were the original therapists. They realized that hostile feelings could not-should not for mental health reasons- be repressed, but that the murdering of an ‘enemy’ was not really good for the community. Sticking pins in a image could offer a place to release these negative feelings without the shedding of blood. I can think of many other examples of how the old ‘wise ones’ used what have become modern day psychological therapies. Therapists still use similar ‘acting out’ techniques with their clients. As far as I know, they don’t call it witchcraft.

Main References:

Toward A Psychology of Being-A. H. Malsow, 1968

Motivation and Personality-A. H. Maslow, sec.ed. 1970

The Further Reaches of Human Nature-A. H. Maslow, 1971

On The Web:

ABRAHAM MASLOW

SELF ACTUALIZATION

Secondary Resources:

CLASSIC ADLERIAN PSYCHOLOGY. Adler’s personality theories had an influence on Maslow’s work.

WILLIAM JAMES-THE VARIETIES OF RELIGIOUS EXPERIENCE The classic William James work.

WORKS OF GEORGE HERBERT MEAD. Links to Mead’s various writings on the psychology of religion.

THE MOO PROJECT-COLLEGE CASE STUDIES ON MASLOW. Four students’ personal evaluations. Nice little color treat included on this page, too.

Originally posted 2009-11-15 00:47:01.

(Note from Daven:  I place this here because, as a former member of the Army myself, I feel for those who are trying to perform their rituals in that too regimented atmosphere.  I would argue one point in this, however.  I too was at Fort Benjamin Harrison, but back in 1987-88 and I performed several pagan ceremonies there, just not openly with the blessings of the Officers.  Keep this triumph in mind when you are in the Military, and remember those soldiers down in Fort Hood, TX and all the problems they went through to get their Coven launched.  Use your head.)

A Military Witch

by Morgan Beard

Being a professional soldier in the U.S. Army is not a profession one tends to associate with the religion of Wicca. I was surprised when I first heard of Wiccans in the armed forces, and even more surprised a short time later to find myself in the Army—Reserves, that is. However, once the shock wore off, one of my immediate concerns was: How could I practice my religion while training?

I did not know very much about that Army at the time, or about how it deals with religion. With the help of a friend, I discovered that the Army fully recognizes Wicca and Paganism. I assumed though, that while Wicca is officially recognized as a religion, it would be unofficially discouraged. During basic training at Fort Jackson (SC), my schedule was too demanding to give me time to perform an rituals, as I would have liked to do. I did finally get a chance to speak to my Chaplain (a Lutheran, as it happened). He told me that he had dealt with Wiccans in basic training before, and I was given permission to use the barracks garden for meditation.

After basic training, I was shipped to Fort Ben Harrison (IN), for advanced training in my chosen specialty of finance. One of the first things I did upon arriving at Fort Harrison was to make an appointment with the Chaplain.

I think I baffled him when we met. Fort Harrison is a small post with relatively few students. The Chaplain had never had a Wiccan request to perform ritual before. He consulted his superior, the post Chaplain, and got permission for me to practice Wicca on post.

His next step was to inform my company commander and drill sergeant of what I was doing. There were only two constraints places on my rituals. I had to have a cadre member present, and I had to wear battle-dress-uniform (camouflage suit) for the ritual. Please keep in mind that these constraints were only because of my training status. Had I been out of training, I would not have had to obey them.

My drill sergeant and I discussed my practice, and although she had never heard of Wicca, she was very open-minded about it. She got me off duty on the nights in question, which later turned out to be a big help. With her and the Chaplain’s assistance, I was able to perform the first Wiccan/Pagan ritual ever at Fort Ben Harrison on 10 October 1992, and the second on Samhain. History had been made!

I would like to emphasize that at no time during basic or advanced training did I feel that I was being discriminated against or harassed by Army personnel. It was actually the opposite–everyone went out of there way to make sure I had what I needed.

This is important for people who are thinking of joining or for those already in the armed forces. realize that you do have the right to practice your religion. asserting yourself as I did has two advantages. One, it paves the way for future Wiccans who may follow in your footsteps. Two, it forces the Army and other services to recognize that Wicca is a living and growing religion whose members deserve consideration. If policy makers believe that only one in every 10,000 soldiers is a Wiccan or Pagan, they are less likely to pay attention to our needs than if that figure is one in 1,000 or even on in 100.

An added advantage is that you can network or make contact with other Wiccans or Pagans. For instance, there were two other Wiccans in my basic training company of 240 people. I never knew about them until I spoke to the Chaplain.

There’s a difference, though, between requesting permission to perform private or open rituals and running through the streets screaming “I’m a Wiccan!” As in the civilian world, in the military it’s not always a good idea to advertise that your Wiccan. While Army people are generally open-minded about religion, there are still a lot of devout Christian soldiers who simply can’t put away their prejudices and deal with the idea of working beside a “witch”.

I do know from experience that it’s too easy to feel lost or spiritually isolated, in the Army or elsewhere, to let anything come between you and the Lady and the Lord. Whether you’re worried about prejudice (a valid concern), or trying to cut through spools of red tape to be allowed to practice your beliefs freely, work calmly and patiently–but persistently.

I don’t believe I’ve done anything extraordinary. I simply opened up an intelligent dialogue with my Chaplains and chain of command, answering their questions, and made sure they understood there was nothing to worry about or be afraid of. Military or civilian, that’s usually all we can do; most often, it’s more than enough.

This file may be freely transmitted so long as none of the content is changed. If quoted or published be sure to give appropriate credit. (c) 1994 Morgan Beard

Originally posted 2009-11-14 21:44:50.

by Bo Lozoff

Bo wrote the following article for the Human Kindness Foundation newsletter at Christmas-time, 1989. It was then included in his 1990 book Just Another Spiritual Book.

Since then, the essay has been widely circulated, though almost always uncredited. Radio commentator Paul Harvey included the piece in his radio program on two occasions, apparently receiving a deluge of calls, mail, and faxes (we hope mostly positive). Now this piece can be found at numerous websites, often edited, and usually listed as, “author unknown.” The following is the original letter.

Date: Eternity

From: GOD

To: My Children on Earth

re: Idiotic religious rivalries

My Dear Children (and believe me, that’s all of you),

I consider myself a pretty patient Guy. I mean, look at the Grand Canyon. It took millions of years to get it right. And how about evolution? Boy, nothing is slower than designing that whole Darwinian thing to take place, cell by cell and gene by gene. I’ve even been patient through your fashions, civilizations, wars and schemes, and the countless ways you take Me for granted until you get yourselves into big trouble again and again.

But on this occasion of My Son’s birthday, I want to let you know about some things that are starting to tick me off.

First of all, your religious rivalries are driving Me up a wall. Enough already! Let’s get one thing straight: These are your religions, not Mine. I’m the Whole Enchilada; I’m beyond them all. Every one of your religions claims there’s only one of Me (which, by the way, is absolutely true). But in the very next breath, each religion claims it’s My favorite one. And each claims its bible was written personally by me, and that all the other bibles are man-made. Oh, Me. How do I even begin to put a stop to such complicated nonsense?

Okay, listen up now: I’m your Father and Mother, and I don’t play favorites among My Children. Also, I hate to break it to you, but I don’t write. My longhand is awful, and I’ve always been more of a “doer” anyway. So all your books, including the bibles, were written by men and women. They were inspired, remarkable people, but they also made mistakes here and there. I made sure of that, so that you would never trust a written word more than your own living Heart.

You see, one Human Being to me — even a Bum on the street — is worth more than all the holy books in the world. That’s just the kind of Guy I Am. My Spirit is not an historical thing, It’s alive right here, right now, as fresh as your next breath.

Holy books and religious rites are sacred and powerful, but not more so than the least of You. They were only meant to steer you in the right direction, not to keep you arguing with each other, and certainly not to keep you from trusting your own personal connection with Me.

Which brings Me to My next point about your nonsense: You act like I need you and your religions to stick up for Me or “win souls” for My Sake. Please, don’t do Me any favors. I can stand quite well on my own, thank you. I don’t need you to defend Me, and I don’t need constant credit. I just want you to be good to each other.

And another thing: I don’t get all worked up over money or politics, so stop dragging My name into your dramas. For example, I swear to Me that I never threatened Oral Roberts. I never rode in any of Rajneesh’s Rolls Royces. I never told Pat Robertson to run for president, and I’ve never ever had a conversation with Jim Bakker, Jerry Falwell, or Jimmy Swaggart! Of course, come Judgement Day, I certainly intend to…

The thing is, I want you to stop thinking of religion as some sort of loyalty pledge to Me. The true purpose of your religions is so that you can become more aware of Me, not the other way around. Believe Me, I know you already. I know what’s in each of your hearts, and I love you with no strings attached. Lighten up and enjoy Me. That’s what religion is best for.

What you seem to forget is how mysterious I Am. You look at the petty little differences in your scriptures and say, “Well, if this is the Truth, then that can’t be!” But instead of trying to figure out My Paradoxes and Unfathomable Nature — which, by the way, you never will — why not open your hearts to the simple common threads in every religion?

You know what I’m talking about: Love and respect everyone. Be kind. Even when life is scary or confusing, take courage and be of good cheer, for I Am always with you. Learn how to be quiet, so you can hear My Still, Small Voice (I don’t like to shout). Leave the world a better place by living your life with dignity and gracefulness, for you are My Own Child. Hold back nothing from life, for the parts of you that can die will surely die, and the parts that can’t, won’t. So don’t worry, be happy (I stole that last line from Bobby McFerrin, but he stole it from Meher Baba in the first place.)

Simple stuff. Why do you keep making it so complicated? It’s like you’re always looking for an excuse to be upset. And I’m very tired of being your main excuse. Do you think I care whether you call me Yahweh, Jehovah, Allah, Wakantonka, Brahma, Father, Mother, or even The Void or Nirvana? Do you think I care which of My Special Children you feel closest to — Jesus, Mary, Buddha, Krishna, Mohammed or any of the others? You can call Me and My Special Ones any name you choose, if only you would go about My business of loving one another as I love you. How can you keep neglecting something so simple?

I’m not telling you to abandon your religions. Enjoy your religions, honor them, learn from them, just as you should enjoy, honor, and learn from your parents. But do you walk around telling everyone that your parents are better than theirs? Your religion, like your parents, may always have the most special place in your heart; I don’t mind that at all. And I don’t want you to combine all the Great Traditions into One Big Mess. Each religion is unique for a reason. Each has a unique style so that people can find the best path for themselves.

But My Special Children — the ones your religions revolve around — all live in the same place (My Heart) and they get along perfectly, I assure you. The clergy must stop creating a myth of sibling rivalry where there is none.

My Blessed Children of Earth, the world has grown too small for your pervasive religious bigotry and confusion. The whole planet is connected by air travel, satellite dishes, telephones, fax machines, rock concerts, diseases, and mutual needs and concerns. Get with the program! If you really want to help Me celebrate the birthday of My Son Jesus, then commit yourselves to figuring out how to feed your hungry, clothe your naked, protect your abused, and shelter your poor. And just as importantly, make your own everyday life a shining example of kindness and good humor. I’ve given you all the resources you need, if only you abandon your fear of each other and begin living, loving, and laughing together.

Finally, My Children everywhere, remember whose birth is honored on December 25th, and the fearlessness with which He chose to live and die. As I love Him, so do I love each one of you. I’m not really ticked off, I just wanted to grab your attention because I hate to see you suffer. But I gave you Free Will, so what can I do now other than to try to influence you through reason, persuasion, and a little old-fashioned guilt and manipulation? After all, I Am the original Jewish Mother. I just want you to be happy, and I’ll sit in The Dark. I really Am, indeed, I swear, with you always. Always. Trust In Me.

Your One and Only,

God

Originally posted 2009-11-20 08:48:00.

This is a video that Ellen made up in response to the recent rash of gay/bullying suicides.

Not to detract from the whole story she just told, but I was victim of it too. I suffer from PTSD in regards to one incident where my sexuality and bullying was combined. I nearly killed myself that time. I was the butt of “jokes” from others who thought it would be funny to make a date with me and then stand me up.

This is not acceptable on any level.

Those of you who think it is, need to go to the psychologist worse than the victims of your “jokes” do.  This scars for life.  There is NO fixing it.

To my shame, I passed on the abuse to others.  I can’t make up for it, but when I found out that I had done so, I tried to make it right.  There is no fixing it, but the cycle can be stopped.

Originally posted 2010-10-02 11:29:46.

Originally posted by Elf on her blog at Dreamwidth.

There’s no shortage of blog posts and comments by Christians, saying, “please don’t consider me to be one of those nasty icky bigoted unthinking fundamentalists.”

* “Christianity is much broader, deeper and richer than fundamentalism.”[1]
* “I wish people wouldn’t lump all Christians in the same group”[2]
* “There is a vile strain of Christianity, indeed, but there are caring, thoughtful moderate and progressive Christians out there – millions of them.” [3]
* “I want it to be clear to you and your family that we do not all hate. We are not all bigots.”[4]

I could quote more. (The roundup for this post turned up half a dozen more easily; I’m sure I could find more than that with a bit of work. Just plug “not all christians are” or “all christians aren’t” into Google.)

As if I couldn’t tell them apart; as if I am incapable of noticing the difference between a kind and thoughtful person and one who spouts bigotry and oppression and quotes a book to support it. As if I hadn’t noticed that the majority of Christians, like the majority of people in every other religion, are basically decent folks who want good pay and healthy families and a bit of fun & leisure on the side. As if I can’t tell a mundane from a scholar from a wingnut. (Believe me, I know from wingnuts.)

And on top of the insult to my basic perception abilities, there’s the implication that I’m supposed to care which sub-sect they’re allied with. That I’m supposed to keep track of the myriad varieties of Jesusites and sort out which official doctrines are bugfuck nutso (um, we can agree there are some of those, right?) and which ones are just somewhat pushy and which ones are openly tolerant of real diversity—and among those, which allow how much individual differences within the sect identification.

As if it were my responsibility, as a non-Christian, to sort out which of the followers of J the C are rational and caring human beings, like their scripture tells them to be, and which ones are using the same scripture to justify hatred and slaughter.

They want, they tell me (or my friends, or my allies, or people who share some of my beliefs) to be accepted for who they are. They want to be judged on their own merits, not lumped in with a bunch of bigots who get media attention ‘cos they’re rich and white and male. They want me to understand that they’re “not like that.”

You know what I want?

I want my kids to not be expected to attend school on the days of our religious services. I want strangers not to offer me the blessings of a deity I do not worship. I want members of my religion to be able to meet in public, anywhere in the US, without risking slashed tires, broken windows, and physical attacks. I want the freedom to answer questions about my religion without fear of reprisal, even if those questions come from children. I want judges to stop ruling that non-Christian influences are dangerous for children, and giving custody to the Christian parent. I want my president to stop reminding me that he doesn’t represent my religion’s needs or wants, that he is oblivious to my religion’s truths.

And that’s just the basic, don’t-want-to-live-in-fear wants. I don’t dare let myself have wants that Christians can take for granted… the ability to walk into a random drugstore and find greeting cards with my religious symbols on them, libraries to stock books about my religion and treat them with respect, prayers of my faith offered by public officials in times of disaster, history classes that acknowledge the history and importance of my religion. The ability to move somewhere where all my neighbors will be of my religion, or at least, will not hate it. The ability to hang holiday decorations in my windows, or on my cubicle walls, without facing a barrage of annoying questions, much less vandalism.

The pie-in-the-sky dream? The ability to have a public temple in a city of less than 100,000 people, where the government forms are handed out in seven languages–or in a rural area more than 10 miles from the nearest library. The ability for a dozen neighbors to pool their funds, buy a tiny plot of land, and build a religious services building they’re pretty sure won’t get burned down within a year.

I don’t expect any of those to happen. Not in my lifetime, and maybe not ever. My religion’s weird, and there’s never been a whole lot of public acceptance of weird.

But I’d like to not have to hide my religious symbols under my shirt on the bus. And I’d like my kids to be free to attend our religious services when they’re supposed to happen, not on the nearest JHVH-inspired holy day.

So, umm. The “nice” Christians don’t like getting backlash about fundies. They believe they are persecuted by more restrictive branches of Christianity. Maybe they are. But they’re not lacking privilege because of it—not all persecutions break along privilege lines. They’re not being oppressed even when they’re being hated.

And it is not. my. job. To figure out what kind of Christians are which, to figure out who belongs to what sect and where their individual beliefs lie.

I’m big on individualism. REALLY big on it. Enough to override decades of experience that tells me that anyone wearing a cross is probably a danger to me and my family, or at the very least, a danger to my comfort.

I don’t *mind* the apologetics, exactly. They’re a phase; Christians who are waking up to their privilege usually go through a stage of “OMG, I’m not like those people! I promise!” And what wakes them up, and what exactly they realize, is of interest to their friends. I am *endlessly* fascinated by all sorts of religious discussion, including the eternal “creation vs evolution” debate that I really can’t understand as a dichotomy (I have no problems with both); I just don’t have the energy to keep running on that hamster wheel.

But being interesting & entertaining doesn’t mean something is new and innovative. There’s a good deal of Special Snowflakism in most “All Christians Are Not Like That” posts. And more in most comments on news blogs.

Sometimes I’m amused by it. Sometimes I’m interested in a particular perspective. Sometimes, I seethe at the reminder that they have the safety to speak about their religious beliefs and practices, in public, without fear of reprisal. (Oh, I can speak up. I live in one of those aforementioned cities of over 100k people. Nobody cares what my religion is; I can dye my hair blue and wear black robes in public and nobody blinks. What I can’t do, is safely move to a city ~100-300 miles away where the rent would be 1/3 of what we’re paying, and be just as public.)

I am never happy about the reminder of how *trapped* I am.

Originally posted 2010-08-22 22:41:31.

NeoPagans and Star Trek; A Comparison Study

Gene Rodenberry went to his grave telling stories that, although they supposedly happened light years away, were relevant to our every day lives. From the beginning, he claimed that the characters and races on Star Trek were parallels for people here on Earth. Little did anyone know that the characters were actually taking on traits of Neo-Pagan sects across the country! Was Gene Pagan? Who knows, but sit back and enjoy this little trip, where no Pagan has gone before….

Wiccans – The United Federation of Planets (The Wicca-Bes and most traditionalists)
The Federation means well. They let just about everybody into their little social club, so long as they agree to play nice. They don’t talk about rules much, but keep referring to one Prime Directive that all other laws are based on. That said, they frequently violate that rule when the need suits them. Often heard speaking in various UK accents, even though they’re not from the islands (Et tu, Jean-Luc?)

Asatru – Klingons
Obsessed with honor and combat. Have no qualms with eating meat and eat it with obvious relish. Insist they did everything first (“But Hamlet is so much better in the original Klingon.”) And who wants Klingon opera, when you can have Wagner’s Die Neibelung?

Ceremonialists – Vulcans
Have you ever heard someone say, “Excuse me, I was reading this over your shoulder and wanted to tell you: “anal retentive” has a hyphen in it.”? Everything is very orderly in their universe. No room for untidy things like emotions and the like.

Druids – Bajorans (with special guests: the Tuatha de Dannan as The Prophets)
You cannot separate the Bajorans from their faith. Religion permeates the very air they breathe. Although this should be a unifying force on their devastated environment, they are constantly fighting with one another. Like many other races, they are subject to charismatic leaders.  (Daven’s Comment: I AM NOT!!!)

New Agers – Betazoids
Profoundly psychic when you don’t want them to be; dense as a rock (crystal) when you actually need some help. Spend an awful lot of time talking about “vibes” and are perpetually concerned with how others feel. If they weren’t so damn cute, you’d just want to smack them. You only see the women of this race.

Numerologists / Kabbalahists – Binars
Numbers are everything, don’t you know. Can loudly pronounce a given number (93!) and have people laugh at it like it was a punch line. Draws all sorts of really interesting links between things based on the numerological significance. Socially uncouth. The only difference between the Binars and numerologists is that Binars have mates that understand them.

Setians / Satanists – The Skin of Evil (the oil slick that killed Tasha Yar)
A long time ago, a race decided to sluff off all their evil, mean and nasty emotions. They physically excreted these emotions into a big pile of black ooze. The race bailed off the planet, leaving the ooze which, over time, became sentient… sort of, and delights in causing fear and pain in others.

Dianics – The Women of Angel 1
Imagine a planet where women are in charge! It is a wonderful, peaceful place. Everyone gets along all the time and no one ever goes hungry. Yeah, right. Behind the facade of perfect love and perfect trust and gyno-unity, there is an iron fist in that velvet glove. And surprise, surprise, the gynarchy is subject to the same power struggles and in-fighting that the rest of us are

KayOs MagicKians – The Children of Tama (Damok & Jilad on the ocean)
I know I’m speaking English, and I know that THEY are speaking English. However, sometimes, you just can’t seem to understand what these souls are trying to tell you. Although they have something valid and wonderful to share with the Federation, what they have to say is mired in a language that excludes more than it includes. Fnord.

Llewellyn Publications – the Borg
Resistance is futile, you will be assimilated. Your history and beliefs will become part of the Borg Collective, where they will be watered down and spread out evenly between everyone in our race. Lower your shields and hand over your money; resistance is futile.

Originally posted 2009-11-10 01:51:31.

Or:
How the Mormons measure up on The Advanced Bonewits Cult Danger Evaluation Frame

I wrote this article mostly to purge many feelings out of my heart.  ALL of this is based on my personal experiences with the Mormons.  Some are based on many stories of things that happened to others in the church, and they are not isolated incidents either.  If I used someone else’s experience as the basis of making my judgment, it was because there were many who had either identical or very similar experiences.  All of these accusations are documentable, but most can be found on Richard Packham’s Home Page or Recovery from Mormonism – The Mormon Church.

I have to explain about this chart.  The scale is from 1 to 10, with 1 being low to little, and 10 being extremely to total.  The number of the question and a short explanation comes first, then the next paragraph is my score and the reason I scored it as I do.  If you have any questions on this, or need further references, I ask you to contact me.

Reviewing the Mormons (with commentary)

Internal Control: Amount of internal political and social power exercised by leader(s) over members; lack of clearly defined organizational rights for members.

9. The Mormon Church has, through subtle techniques almost total dominion over the lives of the members, all their waking hours are either spent providing for the family through a job and a one-income (father) or in various church duties assigned to the members with no chance of opting out of these duties. These duties are given to them by the leaders of the local church, and it is a “Calling by God” so the member MUST be capable of doing this, they wouldn’t be asked to do it otherwise.

External Control: Amount of external political and social influence desired or obtained; emphasis on directing members’ external political and social behavior.

9. The Mormon Church has many members in political seats. At this point, Utah, Arizona, Oklahoma and many other western states have a majority of the State political offices being filled by Mormons, and many more members from those same states serving as representatives on the National Level in Congress or as political appointees. The Mormon Church claims a membership fo 11 Million Members, giving a significant voting block. Topics are assigned as talks around election time as member speeches in the main worship service that are hot-button political topics, with the slant of the talk being what the church authorities want the members to vote as. IE, in a campaign with candidates who are pro-Choice, there will be a series of talks given by the leaders in conferences that are pro-Life, and the same topic will be “assigned” as topics to member given speeches for any activity, which run 6 days a week.

Wisdom/Knowledge Claimed by leader(s); amount of infallibility declared or implied about decisions or doctrinal/scriptural interpretations; number and degree of unverified and/or unverifiable credentials claimed.

10 The Church claims that the President of the Church is a Prophet of God, infallible when he states something, unless he states something wrong, in which case he’s not being the Prophet, but just being a man. The entire body of the First Presidency (main administrative body in SLC who oversee the day to day operation worldwide) are “inspired” by God in the littlest decisions, and the regional leaders are similarly inspired when they make decisions, on down to the Father of the home being inspired by god when he punishes the children and wife for some infraction.

Wisdom/Knowledge Credited to leader(s) by members; amount of trust in decisions or doctrinal/scriptural interpretations made by leader(s); amount of hostility by members towards internal or external critics and/or towards verification efforts.

9 Being inspired by God makes them infallible and the members constantly reinforce themselves with declarations of how holy the leadership is, how they are Inspired, and how they are very wise. The common adage is “When the Brethren (First Leadership) decide, the thinking is done.” Meaning that the decision is not open for debate again, until they change their mind. Anyone criticizing the Church is ganged up on by members. Overwhelming pressure is put on former members to return to the fold by everyone around them until they have some sort of reaction, either by rejoining or breaking down. Immense sums of money are spent trying to validate ANY portion of the Book of Mormon by the Mormons, but anyone using current fact to refute claims are called “Enemies of God, apostates, liars, deceived by Satan, and their works are explained away.” Each member is trained to be a Mormon Apologist, dismissing or explaining glaring errors in Mormon theology, holy writ and history.

Dogma: Rigidity of reality concepts taught; amount of doctrinal inflexibility or “fundamentalism;” hostility towards relativism and situationalism.

9 Centuries old concepts are still being taught as current or holy writ, and not open to change unless the current head of the church changes it. He is the only one who can make changes to any of the dogma in the Mormon Church. For instance, the Temple rite from 1860 or so had a concept of Blood Oaths, meaning violation of these oaths was punishable by death. This was still taught as what God wanted as recently as 1970. The current head of the Church recently removed those oaths sometime after 1970. Segregation and the inferiority of the descendants of the African Slaves was still taught as recently as 1980, and is still quietly taught, out of hearing of the Black membership.

Recruiting: Emphasis put on attracting new members; amount of proselytizing; requirement for all members to bring in new ones.

10 Mormon Missionaries. ‘Nuff said.

Front Groups: Number of subsidiary groups using different names from that of main group, especially when connections are hidden.

NA Not known. Officially the Church does not own companies, but the records are kept so secret that no one can trace the ownership records of various industries and businesses. It is know that many LARGE companies are owned by Mormon members, such as the Marriott, Wal-Mart, and many others.

Wealth: Amount of money and/or property desired or obtained by group; emphasis on members’ donations; economic lifestyle of leader(s) compared to ordinary members.

10 There is a MANDATORY tithe of 10% GROSS income levied on all members. Psychological pressure is exerted and the real pressure of loss of friendships and “blessings” and talks with the presidency (local) if this tithe is not met. Records are kept of these monies, and all funds are sent to the HQ in Salt Lake, who supposedly disburse this money as needed to the various groups, but any money for local issues like new church buildings are demanded as further offerings from the members, and there is a fast fund. Once a month, the members fast for 24-48 hours. That money, which should buy food, is sent to the Church as a “Fasting Offering”. This means that something like $15,000,000,000 (yes, that’s BILLION) dollars are collected by the Church annually (figuring a middle income family of $30,000 per year and counting 5 million families out of the 11 million members figure) just in tithes. An estimated $100 million is spent in building temples and maintaining various church activities (all local clergy are not paid, they do it as a volunteer), but that is all. While no obvious difference exists between members and the First Presidency’s lifestyles, questions into this is not encouraged by anyone.

Sexual Manipulation of members by leader(s) of non-tantric groups; amount of control exercised over sexuality of members in terms of sexual orientation, behavior, and/or choice of partners.

10 One of the basic tenets of Mormonism is Chastity until marriage. The spoken and taught canard is that if a girl is not a virgin when she marries, she may as well be dead. No exception is made for a girl who is raped either, and there are many cases of suicide by rape victims in the Mormon Church. Males are publicly exhorted to chastity, but if they have sex prior to marriage, depending on the “faith” of the person and their family (read how much the church needs these people and how much money is donated to the Church), it is either overlooked and dismissed or they are castigated as the females are.

Sexual Favoritism: Advancement or preferential treatment dependent upon sexual activity with the leader(s) of non-tantric groups.

1 This is covered by (9) above. If a girl has ANY sexual relations, she is damned to hell and no “decent” male will have her, she may as well be dead because her family will disown her as well.

Censorship: Amount of control over members’ access to outside opinions on group, its doctrines or leader(s).

10 Investigation into the history of the Church is STRONGLY discouraged if the person is using non-church sources, meaning any quality scholarly work. All approved histories are written, edited and published by the Church, and sold in the Church Stores or from Church Catalogs. Multiple magazines are written and published by the Church and all members are almost required to have subscriptions, to the point of multiple subscriptions of the same material coming to the same address and family. Anyone who publicly puts down the Mormon Church are vilified (such as the Tanners) and dismissed as “Enemies of God”.

Isolation: Amount of effort to keep members from communicating with non-members, including family, friends and lovers.

7 While communication with non-members is encouraged in order to convert the “hetathen”, along with family, self-censorship is encouraged and desired in regards to any anti-Mormon material that they encounter. Quite a lot of communication with other members is encouraged, mostly because you are too busy to cultivate interests outside the Church. There is no time to encounter much information from outside the Church.

Dropout Control: Intensity of efforts directed at preventing or returning dropouts.

9 Ex-members who leave are still considered members unless they actively take steps to remove their name from the rolls of the Church, which means that they are contacted and harrassed by local leaders to come back to Church and Missionaries. To get your name removed from the rolls of the Church requires a month long process, and in some cases requires a several year long process which many are not willing to go through, simply because it’s complex. Members in good standing are encouraged to “fellowship” previous members back into the fold, although this ultimately is subject to those political pressures and local conditions. Even death does not keep you safe, as they have an active program to baptize the dead by proxy to make them members of the Church and “save” them.

Violence: Amount of approval when used by or for the group, its doctrines or leader(s).

5 While active pogroms are not condoned nor are they started by Church leaders, if something happens to non-members by members actions, and it looks to be a scandal to the Church, it is covered up, or the offending members are cut loose and disavowed by the Church. There has been little test of this in the last 50 years or so, but it was the case back when the Church was in it’s infancy.

Paranoia: Amount of fear concerning real or imagined enemies; exaggeration of perceived power of opponents; prevalence of conspiracy theories.

8 Those who point out inconsistencies in the Doctrine and who truly question beliefs and search for fulfillment are enemies and trying to bring the Church down. A member in good standing who looks for validation of their beliefs from non-Mormon sources and starts questioning is labeled a traitor and reviled, to the point of sometimes driving people from the Church. Those who question, either within or without the church are not “real Christians” and are trying to bring the Church down. The only reason this score is not higher is because other than being labeled as traitors, nothing is done to them.

Grimness: Amount of disapproval concerning jokes about the group, its doctrines or its leader(s).

9 You rarely hear a Mormon Joke. Either from members or from non-members. If a jokes starts, it is treated as though it were a crime by that person by the Mormon Leadership.

Surrender of Will: Amount of emphasis on members not having to be responsible for personal decisions; degree of individual disempowerment created by the group, its doctrines or its leader(s).

10 Literally all things good come from the Church, to leave the Church is to be a sinner and apostate and to have license to do anything one one wants and to have no morals or conscience. If the Church Leadership decides something, the thinking has been done as far as the Church is concerned as a whole. To disagree with the leadership is to sin. “Follow the Brethren” is the watch phrase. One is encouraged to tell everything to the Church leaders, and they will make decisions for you and your life, despite it not being their life. You are expected to still live with the consequences of those decisions, and the Church takes no responsibility. When going through the “Temple Endowments”, you literally pledge, by binding oaths for those who believe them, everything in your life to the Church, all your money, all your support, all that you have and own and possess, and your family with you.  The Church used this once to raise money to defeat a measure in California supporting Gay Rights.

Hypocrisy: amount of approval for actions which the group officially considers immoral or unethical, when done by or for the group, its doctrines or leader(s); willingness to violate the group’s declared principles for political, psychological, social, economic, military, or other gain.

10 Approval by cover-up. Putting a convicted pedophile in charge of the Primary class (all the children under the age of 10) and then telling the children and their parents that it never happened, that they are lying or making things up and allowing the pedophile to remain in charge is hypocritical, especially when the leadership rails against those who are pedophiles. Approving of young males going out and screwing non-member girls to gain experience, while convincing young ladies who have been raped that they are better off dead and then sanctimoniously stating that every child should be chaste (to the point of masturbation=murder and is a mortal sin) is hypocritical.

For more information, check these links out:

• Reason Filling in the missing pieces of the Mormon History Puzzle.
• Recovery from Mormonism – The Mormon Church
• Richard Packham’s Home Page
• Utah Lighthouse Ministry
• Yahoogroups: ExMormon

Originally posted 2009-11-11 19:43:00.

(I did not write this meditation, I don’t know who did.  This is one of those AOL documents that had no credit give for it, and was posted on AOL unattributed.  I’m sorry for the confusion.  If you wrote this and can prove it, please email me so you can be credited properly.)

Meditation

Ground and center

Close your eyes, breathe deep, in through the nose, hold it, count to three, exhale.

As the air leaves your body, allow the stress you accumulated to leave with it.

Inhale, count to three, exhale.

As the air leaves your body, allow the anger you have accumulated to leave with it.

As the anger leaves, allow your body to relax.

Inhale, count to three, exhale.

As the air leaves your body, allow the guilt you have accumulated to leave with it.

As the guilt leaves, allow your mind to relax.

Inhale, count to three, exhale.

As the air leaves your body, allow the sorrow you have accumulated to leave with it.

As the sorrow leaves, allow your spirit to relax.

Breathe deep, feel the empty places now within. Tonight we will fill those places with love and light.

Visualize before you, a soft blue light. It hangs before you, just off your third eye. A gentle light, filled with the love the Deity has for each of us. Allow the light to pass within, to find your center. Allow the loving light to fill your center.

Now slowly allow this loving blue light to intensify, to grow brighter within you. As it’s glow spreads, let it spread through you, pushing all the negative emotions and energy away from your center, your core.

Allow this gentle light to spread, down your stomach to your groin, up your chest to your shoulders. Now allow this healing energy to flow down your legs to your toes, down your arms to your fingers, up your neck, embracing your crown. Feel the light drive away the darkness, the negative, replacing it with loving, gentle energy, allow Deity to cleanse away that which would harm you.

As the negative energy is pushed away from your body, out of your body, allow it to form a brittle shell about you. A fragile shell that easily shatters, leaving nothing negative behind.

Break the shell. Allow the pieces to fall from you, to gather on the ground. Let Mother Earth claim the pieces, to take them away. Do not worry, She knows how to deal with them. Leave no trace of the shell about you. Let Mother take care of it.

Breathe deep. Allow the light to fill you, from your toes to the ends of your hair, filling you with love and light, KNOW that you are loved, that there are those who care about you, that Deity loves and cares about you.

Exhale. All vestiges of negative energy are gone. You are now filled with the love of Deity.

Affirm with me:

I am loved.

(I AM LOVED)

I am whole.

(I AM WHOLE)

I love.

(I LOVE)

Deity is with me

(DEITY IS WITH ME)

Breathe deep, count to three, exhale. Allow the light to glow within you.

If you have an injury, an illness, let the light linger over the injury, the illness, to heal the injury, cure the illness.

Now send the healing, loving energy to someone you do not know.

Breathe deep, count to three, exhale. Allow the light to shine within you.

Now send the healing, loving energy to someone you know, who needs love and light in their lives, who needs healing.

Breathe deep, count to three, exhale. Allow the glow to warm you.

Now send the loving, healing energy to Mother Earth. Allow Her to use it as She sees neccessary. Send to Her.

Breathe deep, count to three, exhale.

Now allow the light to fortify your aura, to strengthen you, to protect you from the outside influences that would drain you.

Allow the beautiful light to shine without your body, from within. Allow the light to cover you, from top to bottom, bottom to top, in loving blue white light. See the light, now sparkling with silver, flood your aura. The outer shell of your aura draws strength, intensifying, becoming sharply defined. Fill your aura with this living, loving light.

Know that this energy is an inexhaustible supply from Deity, that at any time you may call upon it to protect you, to heal you. Know that your own energy mixes with Deity, and together you reinforce your aura, you reinforce the psychic shell that protects you.

Be aware of yourself, blissful and alert at the center of this loving light.

Breathe deep, count to three. Exhale.

Allow the light to fade from your consciousness, knowing at the same time that it has NOT faded from reality.

Breathe deep, count to three. Exhale.

Release the excess energy, knowing that Deity will guide the energy to where it is needed most.

Breathe deep, count to three. Exhale.

Allow your body to relax, you are becoming aware of your surroundings again.

Breathe deep, count to three. Exhale.

Remember the loving, healing light is a part of you. It strengthens your aura, it protects you.

Breathe deep, count to three. Exhale.

You are back. Waken.

Hug the persons next to you.

Originally posted 2009-11-10 01:50:12.

I follow a lot of people here (on Tumblr), and most apparently don’t understand that it’s not just the outside package that is beautiful, but the internal personality, attitude, love and joy that shine out that combine to make someone beautiful.

Yes, the outside package is what people react to first.  Yes, it is the one that most will judge you on first.  But just like a Christmas Present, sparkly gold paper and nice ribbons do not make the Popeil Pocket Fisherman any better.  Just like wrapping an iPad in the comic section of the newspaper doesn’t detract from the present.

However, since humans are visual oriented, presenting an attractive outer casing is what seems to be important in the very short term.  Yes, beautiful people are more desirable to be around, they are more envied, but that is ONLY because people who look at them ONLY see them as the outer casing.  Just as if you only saw the gold wrapped package or the comics wrapped package.  The casing would be what you would judge on first.

And we are even warned against this.  ”Don’t judge a book by its cover.”  ”Beauty is only skin deep…” and many other such sayings warn us that it’s not the casing, the package, the wrapping that is important, but the contents of the mind, soul and spirit.

So I see people worried about their appearance to the exclusion of all else, and I get very sad.  I get upset when I see someone who only thinks that attractive appearance is what is important.  Hey, I like looking at pretty things around me too, but to stay around those pretty things there has to be more than just pretty appearance.  Because beauty fades, the nicest flower in the world will whither, and the most gorgeous gown will rot with time.  But the personality and the internal qualities are what will last.

I’ve known many girls in my life.  The beautiful ones are very rarely the ones who stay “beautiful” and “thin” and “tanned” and “fit” and “skinny” three or more years after I come to know them.  There are a few like that, but most understand that while their looks may have initially turned my head and had me look at them, the contents of their character are what kept me around.

And I’ll tell you something else.  It’s the “sad, weird” people I enjoy spending time around.  Cookie cutter personalities like are shown on Mean Girls or Bring it On are not anything that interests me.  But the girl with an armful of books, the one who wears spiked hair or a collar, the girl with the black makeup and the pale complexion, THOSE people are interesting.  They have a persona they want to show, and they apparently are willing to show it and be contrary to society rather than trying to conform and blend in.

Those people are worth the time to get to know.

So, ladies and gentlemen, no matter who you are, please revel in yourself.  Yes, put on an attractive appearance but understand it is not the appearance that will keep someone around.  The gestalt of you is what keeps someone.  And understand that even if this person over here left you, it is their loss due to you being a beautiful creature.  Someone else will be with you and the others, well, they have to content themselves with the Pocket Fisherman.

[Copyright Freeman and Sky Dancer, 2003. All rights reserved.
Permission to repost or otherwise distribute is granted provided
the essay is kept intact and this notice included.]

The question keeps coming up, what makes someone fluffy, or a fluff-bunny?  The concept of a fluff-bunny is similar to “twinkie” as used in many American Indian communities: someone who either plays at the spiritual practices or is serious about it but goes for stereotypes and glitz rather than factual information.

Practicing any significant number of these characteristic behaviors will be good and sufficient cause to label you accordingly. These are from actual experience, but they don’t all apply to any one person — we hope. Several of them seem contradictory; this doesn’t appear to matter to the people in question. Note: if you find this list offensive (especially if it bothers you that it has 13 items), then you are probably a classic fluffy. If you think we’re being unnecessarily confrontational with this, you may be right (but see item 5). If you think we’re picking on Wiccans, maybe so; but we do know plenty of non-Wiccan fluffies (check out http://www.whywiccanssuck.com/ and http://wicca.timerift.net/ for other detailed views on the Decadence of Wicca).

1. Claim to be practicing some really old path, but don’t put forth the effort to find out what people actually did or believed on that path.

2. Ignore anything dark and threatening, even if pretending to work with dark deities. Talk about how your deity of choice is always good or always right, or pretend your favorite dark goddess is really a misunderstood sweetie-pie.

3. Accept any kind of nonsense you’re told by another fluffy or read in some book with a crescent moon on the spine. Alternatively, accept any one source as definitive, no matter what those tight-assed intellectuals think about it. And do pass along whatever it is you think you know as if you invented it.

4. Get all worked up at any kind of challenge involving logic or fact. Only feelings really matter. Especially, make a big point of being huffy at anyone who doesn’t take whatever you say at face value, because “everyone is entitled to an opinion.” Disregard what others have to say if it doesn’t affirm what you already believe, whether or not they can prove their claims.

5. Avoid conflict at all costs, and jump into other people’s disagreements, even if you’re not directly involved, to try to get them to agree for agreement’s sake.  Agree with other people just to smooth things over, or even lecture them on how they should just get along.

6. Try to get others to refrain from using profanity or stop talking about a subject because it makes you uncomfortable. For example, go to a clothing-optional event and then pitch a fit if anyone opts to go fully or partially nude.

7. Tell non-fluffies how horrible and/or unspiritual they are for not accepting all pagans, regardless of how asinine their behavior may be; but be sure to tell everyone at the drop of a hat that you’re Not A Satanist, whether they asked or not.

8. Be sure to complain frequently about persecution, whether you’ve actually experienced any or not. Extra points if you think someone choosing not to do business with you is “persecution” or if you repeat any form of the Burning Times Myth:
   - 9 million died (or any number greater than about 40,000)
   - Those condemned as witches were Wiccans (or any kind of Pagan)
   - People were burned at Salem (try hanged and pressed)
   (You might want to check the Covenant of the Goddess website for a reasonable account of the Witch Hysteria from a source with impeccable Wiccan credentials, except that doing so might be non-fluffy.)

9. In conversation in person or otherwise, always assume that the Wiccan Rede (or whatever your code of honor happens to be) applies to all Pagans. If mildly challenged on this, act confused; if strongly challenged, go into Major Evil Eye Mode and accuse the Rede-Infidel (who OBVIOUSLY has no ethics whatsoever) of Satanism or Crowleyism or worse.

10. Presume to lecture others on any of the Favorite Fluffy Topics:
    -  Why Witchcraft is a religion
    -  Only Wiccans are Witches
    -  What Witches (your definition) don’t do: Hexes, spells for selfish purposes, animal sacrifice (we’re not like those awful Santerians and Vodou-ists), sex magick, etc.
    -  Why not use magick to interfere with another’s Will or Karma — even by healing them
    -  How the world was a happy, peaceful matriarchy until those horrible men had to mess it all up
    -  How ritual nudity, sex magick, and the scourge are all in traditional Wicca only because Uncle Gerald was a dirty old man.

11. Insist that Wicca, or whatever your path is, is whatever you make it, regardless of its history. Demand respect for what you’re doing even as you trash the efforts of your precursors and insist on calling the trash by the same name.  Don’t bother renaming what you do, however loosely based on the original form, because you want to ride on the coattails of people who went before and claim some sort of lineage regardless of the lack of similarities between what they did and what you do.

12. If your belief is that “All Goddesses are One Goddess” and “All Gods are One God” and ultimately all deities are aspects of the One, use this as an excuse to not bother learning about or working with specific deities. Or, when you do call on a Lord and Lady by name, mix and match any two from any pantheons and any times.

13. You can be lacking in all of the preceding Fluffy Traits, but if you demonstrate this one, you’re in the Fluffy Club: Don’t show any signs of having been touched by divinity or ecstatic experience. Many mainstream Christians sing hymns as if they were laundry-lists, and everyone accepts them, so that is what we want to do. Look askance at people who actually get out of themselves in ritual or celebration. Care more about what society and/or your friends think than what your deities think or whether you are actually getting anything out of what you do.  Be sure not to do anything, even if it would develop your path/abilities/insights, that might possibly provoke disapproval or make you lose face.

Why do we make such a big deal about fluffies?  We’d happily let it pass if they weren’t so busy trying to impose their fluffy values on the rest of the community.  The rabid fervor with which they attempt to impose their flippancy on others gives outsiders the impression that we’re all stupid, incapable of critical thinking skills, and inconsistent.  Quite frankly, we don’t appreciate that and we don’t appreciate being told we need to behave in stupid, unthinking, and inconsistent ways.  So while you are certainly entitled to believe whatever you wish, you don’t have a right to force it on us, but we do have a right to call you on your bullshit when we see it.

Originally posted 2009-11-14 23:17:28.